For us who believe:

What about the times when God’s friendship doesn’t seem friendly?
What about when talking to God is more frustrating than comforting?


Tonight I am frustrated. So frustrated. I drove home late and could feel the frustration settle around me. I wanted to ask God for something, but I didn’t. Do you understand not wanting to ask God for something, out of fear that he will give the opposite of what you ask? I’m serious. Have you ever asked for bread and felt like God gave you a stone instead?

Read this: “We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express… the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will” (Romans 8: 26-27). I’ve wondered if this means that the Spirit removes the words from my prayers and lays only my desire before the Father. If so, I wonder how my frustrated desires tonight are being translated, because I really do not want the words “bread” and “stone” to be misinterpreted.

Dwight Edwards used to say that God is wonderfully secure and able to handle my anger towards him. “Find refuge from the Lord in the Lord.” But many of us just stop. We stop fighting. We stop dreaming. We grow disenchanted with mostly everything… it’s a conditioned response, right? Disappointment has followed our good hopes enough times in the past, and why should we expect anything different the next time around?

I have a few situations that are nothing short of grotesque as far as I’m concerned, and I don’t like grotesque. I like peace. Being patient in the confusion and trusting a God I don’t understand is not natural. I want to SEE things be made right. I want to UNDERSTAND why bread from God often seems like a stone. I don’t have an easy name to live up to. On top of that, walking by faith is no longer recognized as an intelligent option in our world… “BUT God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things...” 1 Corinthians 1: 27-28