Love War and Art

I’m home from a conference on how to teach students to read and write… more. Yesterday I listened as a woman read picture books to a room of adults. She adjusted her accent to that of a small town Texas woman and often looked up to observe non-verbal responses. Her intentions were to inspire writing ideas within us, but instead I was overcome by two images from her books. The first was the open desert; the second was the open prairie. Places where the heavens overcome the earth.

At one point we discussed vampire novels and the question—why are they so popular? It sparked my interest for a few reasons, one being that I have a student who does her best to regularly look like a vampire. She has expressed her desire to be a vampire. Recently Felix and I listened to a pastor talk about this same question… he had been overwhelmed with the amount of violence and sex in entertainment and went to sleep burdened about it. All night the Lord gave him visions and spoke over and over the phrase “It’s all about love; it’s all about war.” There is a need for both. Vampires are the world’s merging of the two. Throw immortal life in there, and of course it sells.

My conference group came to the same thought. Eventually the discussion led into the question—how do you get an uninterested non-reader hooked on reading? The conclusion I heard? Find a book with sex and violence and place it in their hands. I asked how the parents respond to this. The advice I received was to give the parents a disclaimer—dear parents, my intention is that through this book your child will learn to recognize such vital writing elements as theme, character, and plot development, so please overlook chapter 5, as it is quite sensual. The teacher then said—we rarely have a parent who minds, except for that one over-religious mother.


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Places where the heavens overcome the earth… I swell with a desire to go there, to see, to look up for awhile, to remember how the land grows so thin, scared to look up. If it realized all that hovered above, it might crumble and blow away. It might find some higher purpose for the soul's pull towards love and war.

I am going to paint some heavy skies, and I hope to capture what I feel. I just found out I'll be participating in Ft. Worth's art festival in April. If you feel moved to encourage me along the way, I need it. Waco's art fest last September was a great weekend. Here are some paintings from that...

New Art and Other Frontiers

This is a new painting with audio of my dear husband speaking for the large and small cabbages. He is so funny!

On the home front, Felix and I moved to Waco, TX two months ago. Waco is home of Baylor University, the Dr. Pepper museum, the Texas Ranger Hall of Fame, 90% of the world's Snickers bars, and the freak legend of David Koresh. To quote Matt Graham, "Waco is an armpit, but it's like the armpit of someone you really like." We've been finding some places we really like, such as Homestead Heritage, Antioch church, Cameron Park's running trails (minus the fleas), and the Dancing Bear. We are happy to be here and so grateful for jobs! Felix is working as a city planner, and right now he's researching about how agricultural zones can prevent city sprawl and create sustainability for a city. Is that interesting or what!? In August I'll be teaching English for 6th and 11th graders at a local charter school, so I've been going to the library and briefing up on all those good books they get to read throughout the year.

Found this when browsing through Portland Studios, one of my favorite places to visit on the web, and it reminded me I've been meaning to read something by Neil Postman, an author who comes on good recommendation from a pastor of mine. If you can't read what it says, here you go:

"At some point it becomes far from asinine to speak of the god of Technology- in the sense that people believe technology works, that they rely on it, that it makes promises, that they are bereft when denied access to it, that they are delighted when they are in its presence, that for most people it works in mysterious ways, that they condemn people who speak against it, that they stand in awe of it, and that, in the born-again mode, they will alter their lifestyles, their schedules, their habits, and their relationships to accommodate it. If this be not a form of religious belief, what is?" - Neil Postman

Of course, I post this after spending a month staying up late in hotel rooms watching cable, playing hours of Mario Cart at my parents' house, daily watching movies on my laptop when at home, and going to see all the new hits at the Cinemark. If Felix and I had Internet or t.v. at our house, we realize that nothing would get done and then we'd cuss because nothing got done! And Felix'd cuss again, because he could have burned more calories sleeping than watching t.v.

Today is Sunday.

It was an early Sunday morning, and the weekend's work got done yesterday. The washing, drying, putting away, dusting, sweeping, and mopping... all done. A free day was arriving in ease, and I woke this morning at 6:30 to see it like a gift slowly unwrapping.

The later morning was reserved for pumpkin waffles, but the morning's first business was to make coffee, head to the living room, open the windows, and be still. I sat by the window and watched dark blue clouds slide through the light blue dawn. I heard leaves flutter, and the wind passed through the windows, reaching my uncovered feet. It all made my spirit feel whole, with nothing lacking. I believed in the Lord, and I felt the belief.

There are occasions like this morning when my self should be silent and listen for the extraordinary. I hear it when close friends sing along to the same song. I heard it when we left our wedding, and I cried from the overwhelming sense of being loved by friends and especially by family. I heard it this past week when I woke in the night to hear Felix praying over me, that I be blessed with new songs.

I want that blessing. I am ready for new songs again, and for new art. Felix's encouragement is life-giving. While the idea of marriage always seemed scary, the idea of sharing life with Felix came so natural. I love our bike rides and grocery store dates. I love feeling the Spirit move when we pray. Last week we made a fire in the chimenea on our front porch. We sat on therma rests, ate the last piece of yummy carrot cake from our wedding, and watched "The Last Mimsy" on my laptop. Urban camping as Felix called it. We even saw rats running across the power lines! And after the movie we stayed there talking of how natural it feels to be married to eachother and how odd that we will never again wonder, "Am I going to get married someday?"

I've had thoughts of falling snow lately. I'm not sure why, except the lovely weather here makes me think of things I love. Last night I tried explaining to Felix the way I feel about falling snow-- the insulating, clean silence it brings. There is something restorative about it. Sundays like this come to me like falling snow.

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"There was a white horse on a quiet winter morning when snow covered the streets gently and was not deep, and the sky was swept with vibrant stars, except in the east, where dawn was beginning in a light blue flood..."
-Winter's Tale by Mark Helprin

My Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

As of last week I am officially engaged to marry my dear friend, Felix Landry. Many of you probably did not know I was dating someone, and I realize that news of engagement may come as quite a surprise! Maybe your response is “How quick!” or “How exciting!” or “How quick and exciting!” Either way, I desire that you all feel included, because you all have been special characters in my life.

Felix and I met during my sophomore year of college through our mutual friend, Justin. Felix and Justin were on the same YoungLife team, and Justin and I did a lot of music stuff together. Anytime Justin sang, Felix and I were usually around to listen. From time to time we ran into each other and enjoyed our conversations, but dating never occurred to us.

The last time I saw Felix was at my farewell party before I moved to Colorado in 2006, and after I moved we lost touch. When I moved back to College Station I had no idea he still lived here. This past March (2009) I ran into our mutual friend, Tim, who told me Felix was in graduate school at A&M. The next week Felix invited me to dinner with him and his friends. After dinner I joined him at his home church where I experienced the warmth of his community of believers here in the Brazos Valley. A window into a lovely world opened up to me that evening.

It turns out that the Lord allowed us notice one another. Felix continued asking me to spend time with him. Within a couple of weeks we were dating, and shortly after that he said he intended to marry me. We’ve received encouragement from our friends and families, and we especially feel the Lord giving us freedom and peace to choose life together.

I am delighted. I do not overlook my dear Lord’s kindness-- it moves me deeply. Felix is yet another extension of the Lord’s kindness to me through the years. I praise the Lord, for He is consistently a good, good shepherd! His love is my foundation through all seasons. He is our destination and our true inheritance, and I praise Him.

Here are a few things you may be interested to know about Felix:
He’s named after his grandpa. He’s bike friendly, an Urban Planning student finishing graduate school and working for the city. He’s a rock-climber, so strong he could "face off with the devil” (as my dad said) and can grow a mean beard when in the mood. He’s a tea-drinking reader, always impressing me with his smarts. He's thoughtful and never seems to speak beyond what he believes to be true. He is comfortable and bent toward simplicity. He likes fishing with his dad and likes his closest people close. Although well traveled, he’d be happy to live in College Station for the rest of his life. A few have said he is the male version of myself. This may be somewhat true, except he’s much more decisive and bold than I am. He has a peculiar love for the desert and for the Houston Astros. Many things set his thoughts on the Lord. I love the way He interacts with our dear Lord and with the people in his life. I am excited to know him more and more. He’s my new favorite color. As Kevin says, Felix is my winner-winner chicken dinner.